Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Today's theme

Don't get in your own way. Or stay out of your way Came up 3 different times today so I think that means I should listen up.

Thursday, October 17, 2013


Most days I'm grateful we only live 2 minutes away from our church. It makes it convenient when we're always running late on Sunday mornings, the kids can participate in extra stuff that we'd talk ourselves out of going to if it was a 20 to 30 minute drive, and I like that the girls we see it every day - it's there in our community.

But last night I wanted more time. Wednesday nights the girls are in a programs called "Celebration Kids". snacks, singing and Jesus - and they love it. Madeline was sick so I only needed to pick up Amelia. We have a CD in the car of the songs they're learning from their next program and hearing Amelia belt out Altar of our Praise at the top of her lungs moved the Holy Spirit in me and brought me to tears. My 6-year-old loves, knows, prays and talks to Jesus more than a lot people. She reminds us to pray, she tells us how God made whatever bug she's holding, she tells us the worm is beautiful because God made it. She amazes me. I didn't want it to end, I wanted more than 2 minutes - I wanted a 40 minute drive home with that song on repeat and never even taken a second to blink.

Of all the things I do as a mother and feel I'm failing - none of those matter when I see and hear my kids give glory to God. Because nothing else matters as long as they have Him. Here's the song!

Friday, August 30, 2013

August 12, 2013

A rushed morning meant taking the kids to school then going back home to get ready for work. (I'm the worst I know). My little 6-year-old, I know sensing my frustration says "Even though you're not in real clothes you still look pretty in your nightgown." Amazed by her.

Night's like these

A lost tooth caused a frenzy in our house last night - our cashless house with tooth fairy responsibilites. At 10 pm I asked Madeline if she wanted to go to the ATM with me (she didn't know why of course). A very excited reply of "I'd go anywhere with you" stopped me in my tracks to look at her and pray a prayer of gratitude. I am so thankful for these moments. She's 10-years-old and honestly sometimes I wonder how much time I left with her. Not because I'm dying or anything serious, but because she's growing up and I'm not going to be her favorite person forever (sorry Nick just the facts :)

From the ATM we went to McDonalds to get them fruit and yogurt parfaits for breakfast (no school and they're home alone so it's the least I can do). She's already hinted at chicken nuggets, so when I pull in the drive-thru and she says "I love you mommy" and I know exactly where she's going with this and say "I love you too, but you're not getting nuggets". We did get 59 cent ice cream cones, which to a 10-year-old at 10 pm is pretty exciting itself. That kid doesn't miss a beat "see this is why I need to stay up, I never know when you're going to take me for ice cream."

Sunday, June 16, 2013


There are certain days you'll never forget how you feel - today was one of those of we faced a very emotional goodbye to Madeline as she ventured off to her first away summer camp. Camp Allendale has her for the week, and I am so excited to hear all her stories and see how the week in a treehouse changes get. I had no idea Amelia would be so emotional as we dropped her off - but that was definitely the hardest part for me, seeing her cry and say "I've never been without my sissy before" - which is true and brought out the Niagara Falls in all of us and we hugged and prayed.

Monday, January 28, 2013

Sales girl

In November I started selling advertising. I've never sold anything it my life. But I had a little confidence, belief in the product I'm selling (I've worked in various capacities for the company since 2006) and the desire to do it. It's been an interesting few months. Worry, doubt, anxiety pretty much sum up at least a little major part of my workday.

But today I made a break-through. I grew a pair. A pair of balls. I really stepped out of my comfort zone. And it felt right. I felt like I got more done today than the rest of January combined.

I recently told a co-worker that I've never had a job that makes me want to jump up and down and crawl in a hole and die ALL AT THE SAME TIME! But I truly love it, and I'm excited for what new challenges I'll over come this year.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

First blog of the year

22 days into 2013 I decided to finally write something on my blog.

I almost made a New Year's resolution to blog every day....but I'm a realist, and no way I hell I was settin' myself up for that failure.

BUT I did want to get the courage to share my lil' baby blog this year. With someone other than my husband and one friend follower. And that's a big deal to me. It's scary to me. I have 119 unpublished blog posts people! And that's just because I'm afraid of who might see them out there on the big bad "innernet" (last part said with hillbilly accent ease). Dumb I know, and I need to get over it. So the point is, that I was avoiding said baby* blog because I'd have to talk myself I to sharing.

*baby like little, not like an actual all-about-baby blog. But some days it could be, bc I have a baby you know.

There's a lot on my mind already this year. And even more on my heart.

As a mother of three one of my biggest fears is that my kids will grow up and not like each other. I'm an only child, and my husband has a worthless sister. So I feel like I have virtually no concept of sibling dynamics except what I observe. When I see siblings, I think "I want my kids to be like them when they grow up" not like them personally, but as their sibling-hood. So I thank my Facebook friends who post family pics with siblings. I pick and choose pieces of all of your relationships (or what they look like) to hope for my kids, but ultimately I just want them to not hate each other, and to only be crazy in a good way, not a Nick's sister type of way. I want them to be close, not in a weird cliquy way like the Johnson's,